According to research published in theProceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, people feel more connected to those who respond rapidly to them during conversation. Even third-party listeners expressed the feeling that conversations with quicker response times bolstered their social connection.
Most people engage in many conversations with them within a typical day. Sometimes we click with others, and sometimes we don''t. Researchers found that a technique to discern when people click was based on their conversations.
While the other listens and the roles are reversed, this exchange is arranged fairly seamlessly, although it requires a bit of effort. To respond to a conversation, a person must define and understand their conversation partners'' mind, and therefore establish a connection between them.
I love the feeling of having a good conversation with someone. I wanted to know what makes some conversations work better, but others are doing poorly, according to Templeton. First, we started by simply recording a couple of conversations between people. Eventually, we can quantify different conversation behaviors in these recordings and connect them to how connected people in those conversations expressed self-confidence.
Templeton and her colleagues recruited 66 university students to engage in 10-minute discussions with each other. Each student had a variety of interactions, so they were encouraged to share what they wanted. After each conversation, participants rated their satisfaction.
The researchers used the response times between each speech turn to evaluate conversations with higher response times on average, indicating stronger connections. During conversation, faster response times sparked more sense of connection. Moreover, participants with higher overall response times had partners who enjoyed the conversation more and felt more connected to them.
A follow-up study among a subset of the sample suggested that these effects extend to conversations among friends. Once subjects engaged in conversations with three of their close friends, again, faster response times predicted increased enjoyment of the conversation and enhanced feelings of connection.
Both studies suggested that it was a partner quick response rather than a participants quick response that contributed to increased social connection. Specifically, the researchers found that a partner response time significantly explained the variance in feelings of social connection, while a participants own response time did not. This suggests that a partner prompt response time was received as a signal that they were actively listening and interested.
We demonstrated that when people respond swiftly to each other in conversation, this is a sign that they are connecting with each other, according to Templeton.
Even outsiders perceive slow response time as a signal of social connection. Among the most interesting aspects of Study 1, third-party listeners were assigned to listen to portions of the recorded conversations from Study 1. Importantly, some of these excerpts had been manipulated to include shorter response times (two times the original length).
Participants rated conversations as less enjoyable and the partners as more connected as the response times decreased. Despite their view, they found conversations less engaging and partners as less connected as the response times decreased. Notably, the observers were never told to pay attention to response times, suggesting that they had learned implicitly that response time was a sign of social connection.
The findings suggest that even split-second differences in response times can have an impact on social connection between conversation partners. Future research should also look into other contexts, such as negotiations or arguments, to see if quick response times might be different in these situations.
We explored this in the context of strangers getting to know each other and friends catching up. There are many other kinds of conversations out there! It will be interesting to see whether response time indicates different things in different types of conversations, according to Templeton. We are continuing to look at this dataset to see how other kinds of conversation behaviors reliably relates to connection.
Because these response times are so hot, we don''t believe they''re something that may be faked, according to the study. That means, you may soon be able to immediately respond in an attempt to make someone feel connected to you. The only way to respond quickly is to understand where the other person is coming from and to anticipate where they''re going.
Emma M. Templeton, Luke J. Chang, Elizabeth A. Reynolds, Marie D. Cone LeBeaumont, and Thalia Wheatley on the subject of this research.
