In a bullet train, someone must pay for what happens to a bad bunny

In a bullet train, someone must pay for what happens to a bad bunny ...

Justice, according to Bullet Train, is blind. This makes sense because as the train makes clear, justice doesnt know how hot Bad Bunny is. (Warning: major spoilers for Bullet Train follow.)

The concept of Kotaro Isaka's novel Maria Beetle (), which is a twisted, darkly hilarious game of musical chairs that draws out the train's hidden army of assassins and a powerful dose of Machiavellian justice, has been criticized. Despite being filmed on a high-speed Hayate train from Tokyo to Kyoto, the film does not really go anywhere, as many critics have noted. Imagine my surprise when Bad Bunny's character accidentally kills

The Wolf is a Mexican assassin who seeks revenge for the horrific murder of his wife at his nuptials. The Wolf considers that the Brad Pitts character had something to do with it, but the moment he sees Pitt, The Wolf looks. After an intense (and brief) fracas, Pitt takes a punch, pierced The Wolf through the head.

A little overburdened me to my body.

This quick death is unjustified, as Bad Bunny is very sweet and capable. And hot. I mean, who else has a face that is as delicate and tender as it is robust and supple, cakes so firm and perky? Only Bad Bunny. (Dont believe me? Name another guy who has the ability to re-appropriate rimless spectacles from Republican legislators. Ill wait.)

If it appears like Im objectifying him, that is because I am. The real problem here isnt my tactless thirst; it's the gross dismissal of Bad Bunny's hotness in Bullet Train. But it clearly misunderstands its subject: true justice, as we all know, is on the side of hot people. So, Bad Bunny, the hottest person in Bullet Train, should have been the last one to go.

Though Hope isn't lost, but Hollywood has the potential to rectify this tragic error when Bad Bunny stars as the titular superhero in Marvels El Muerto. I for the first time ever am excited to see an MCU film. So to Marvel filmmakers, if youre reading this, I implore you: don't kill him while my popcorn is still full. These days, Superhero deaths are a hot gag, but Bad Bunny is also hot.

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